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Popular Episodes. That will build compassion for yourself. In fact, it could be kind of sad that those things happened to us and, yeah, being able to feel that compassion, like you said, and to care for ourselves in that way. Allowing sadness is one of the most important parts of this work.
For a few minutes just letting ourselves feel the way we feel.
And that is going to be reflected in your relationship with your children. It will be mirrored. Really, your kids will pick up on it and they will admire you for it. I think we can also express our care for some of the effects of that on our children, and as you said before, more compassion for them because we understand that we were doing something that was involuntary at the time that affected them nonetheless.
You know, I get it. But I can certainly apologize for it. So to a parent like this one in the note, you would encourage the journaling and encourage the awareness, getting in touch with the emotion, being able to go there and write from there, and then what else? Is there more that you would advise this parent to do? It just looks like this mean behavior that children do to us. You know, this really uncooperative, awful stuff. But behind all of that is that same stress and emotion that the parent is reacting out of.
The way that looks and feels takes practice. I want to be that. So that can be a real struggle, especially with people who have had complex trauma, to find their way back to this place. Finding that separation. I think we can offer that parent the path to that right away, that this is something to work on about ourselves, and I think she knows that. This is my issue. This is my stuff that I need to process out.
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But of course the more that you stick to it, the deeper it goes and, you know, the more long lasting experiences you can have. Well, this is really, really helpful.
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And Elisabeth is doing a virtual workshop about this very thing. You can find the details on her website, beatingtrauma. She has many, many … how many articles have you written? I keep getting them in my inbox. Yeah, I do write once a week. All those blogs are free and available to anybody who wants them, but thank you so much, Janet, for mentioning the workshop as well.
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I appreciate it. And you know, as I said in the beginning of this, I am not a survivor of abuse, but I so relate to everything that Elisabeth writes about and talks about. I do think that probably almost all of us have some subtle experiences and behaviors that we were shamed for and things that we can wrestle with that are getting in our way.
I appreciate everything that Elisabeth is doing and her amazing mission that she has. If you read her story, you will see.
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This is probably my favorite topic, is how we can break the generational cycle and become the parents we want to be. Also, here are links to the insightful guest articles Elisabeth has written for my website: Parenting and Triggers — Wounds of the Past and Confessions of a Recovering Helicopter Parent. Enter your first name and email address:. Please share your comments and questions. I read them all and respond to as many as time will allow. Great podcast! Thank you and YES you are right about the mistake which I have fixed.
Transcription services are as imperfect as we all are, I guess. Elisabeth Corey talks about emotional journaling, and writing from the emotion as opposed to about it — what is writing from an emotion? Autumn Grasses In fields of bush clover and hay-scent grass the autumn moon takes refuge The cricket's song is gold Zeshin's loneliness taught him this Who is coming? What will come to pass, and pass? Neither bruise nor sweetness nor cool air not-knowing knows the way And the moon? Who among us does not wander, and flare and bow to the ground? Who does not savor, and stand open if only in secret taking heart in the ripening of the moon?
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Shibata Zeshin , Autumn Grasses, two-panel screen. Margaret Gibson Academy of American Poets Educator Newsletter. Teach This Poem. Follow Us. Find Poets. Read Stanza. Jobs for Poets.
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